Forward. Interesting. Dominant. Unflustered.
Forward. Interesting. Dominant. Unflustered.
A – always
B – be
C – closing
Lesson #1: Be a Man Who Does as He Pleases.
Stop apologising and approval seeking. Whatever you do, do it with deliberate confidence.
I’m not an economist, but through the course I became friends with the professor. Through discussion he would distill and pick out important material he felt I should learn. One of the principles he taught me was, if everyone is out selling apples, you should sell oranges. Idea behind this clear. Applied to interactions of attraction think about it like this; If every guy is being a ‘nice guy’ then be a bit of a jerk. Channel your inner James Dean, Rebel Without a Cause.
This is a very powerful tool to have in your arsenal. I think the power of this concept comes from being different in an attractive way. I don’t have studies to reference but I would wager, if your dressed 9 guys in black and 1 in white, women would rate the man in white more attractive on account of being different.
Still to the principle of playing to your strengths but don’t be afraid to switch things up. If you and everyone plays guitar, you might be the best guitarist but you’re advantage is diminished by the fact that everyone else plays. Instead, show off your photography skill at taking black and white artistic feminine nudes. All for art, right!
Lastly, don’t take this too far. You might be a house party drinking where everyone is telling drinking stories, but telling a girl about your Avant Garde writing skills is not going to help you. Instead tell her about your crazy drinking story of when you were drunk in Amsterdam and got lost in the red light district.
Nothing is worse than getting back, making out, you get into bed and she asks, “Do you have protection?” when you know you don’t. “Umm let me check.” Sorry buddy, you are officially screwed. Bye bye sexy time.
I put protection in every jacket that way if I need it, I have it. Don’t keep them in your wallet; in 6 months when you open it, a little cloud of dust will hit you in the face. If you have to keep it in your pocket, take it out at the end of the night.
2. Get Tested
Get tested. If anyone tries to tell you differently, they are a fucking loser. There is nothing lame about being tested, it’s the most responsible thing you can do. Even curable STIs can leave you infertile if left untreated. So man up and go get tested… It’s free.
I was out at the bar with a few friends, happy to be back on home turf. The bar was full of good looking girls. I’m sitting against the bar enjoying a beer when I make eye contact with a cute blonde and her friend. We hold eye contact triggering my instinct of “Approach her!”. Just to make sure I didn’t miss read her, I turned around to see her still looking at me, smiling as she walked out on to the bar patio to have a smoke.
This is the moment when I should have eaten my fears and say “Hi” to her. But I didn’t, I choked. The rest of the night as we went bar hopping. I was haunted by that missed approach. The stars were alined but I made up some lame ass excuse for not executing. My punishment, was having one golden opportunity slip through my fingers.
If the chance of pulling a fly girl isn’t enough for you, just know for the rest of the night you are going to be haunted by that one missed opportunity. I’ve noticed that when I don’t approach I end up suffering more from missed opportunity that I’ll never have again. Secret I’m sitting here hoping the universe gives me a second shot… not likely. The only way to beat this is to go out and approach, if the odds aren’t as good.
Approach even if the odds are against you. Why? Because you don’t want to go another night slipping into a cold, empty bed with nothing but the thought of missed opportunity. Go to bed kept warm with the embers of having learned a lesson.
You watch it happen. As she begins to fall in love with you and think to yourself, “I’ve been here before”. “You’re so different”, is what she says. But I have never been ‘drunk on love’. whiskey does a fine job, thank you.
Romance wears off quickly today. It isn’t long before we are all bored. I know this particular girl, isn’t “about it”. She doesn’t have the “it” I’m looking for. She hasn’t gotta that _____
Things begin to slowly breakdown, lose speed. I’m half the world away planning my next move… And she knows it. Thats when catatonic becomes real. Even doing everything won’t change anything. I’ve already set sail, It’s only a matter of time before she realizes it too.
The touch of her soft warm skin. The way their hair smells. The taste of her feminine cherry lips. There is so much passion and pleasure to be had. The night is young my friends, be safe.
She was standing, smoking a cigarette. “Hey your from…” we had a short exchange. She said I had balls. Her cig was getting short, “hey lets we go get coffee.”, “I have a boyfriend”.
I emailed K and his email said, “Man the Fuck up.” I described the approach as “brutal” and “sucked”. He said…
“Dude, you’re in Halifax, a university town. The land of hormones and alcohol. If you’re going to tell me about a rejection it had better be some sort of epic story where a chick punched you in the balls in the middle of the cafeteria or where some girl puked on you during your attempt or something. A chick telling you that she has a boyfriend should feel like a commonplace everyday occurrence that you don’t even remember.”
We’ve all seen a girl, that in our perspective, is a perfect 10. You desperately want to approach her but fear keeps you away. But, what if she never gets approached and desperate wants to be approached.
“Doing the unrealistic is easier than doing the realistic,” Tim Ferris, The 4-Hour Workweek
I was reminded of this, having coffee with my friend K. Transposing Tim Ferris on to game you get The Perfect 10 Paradox; Most guys don’t think they can pull the 9 or 10 so they go for the 6 and 7s.
“It’s lonely at the top. Ninety-nine percent of people in the world are convinced they are incapable of achieving great things, so they aim for mediocre. The level of competition is thus fiercest for ‘realistic’ goals, paradoxically making them the most time- and energy-consuming… The fishing is best where the fewest go, and the collective insecurity of the world makes it easy for people to hit home runs while everyone else is aiming for base hits. There is just less competition for bigger goals.” – Tim Ferris
Most guys don’t believe they deserve the best. Instead they go for second best. Girls don’t dress up all sexy for no reason. They want you to notice. Most guys are too scared shitless approach her and if you can, with confidence then you’re already ahead of the competition.
So finally approach that girl who is out of your league. The whole league system is a myth anyway; start acting like it! Today my friend, you are going to approach the apex girl you’re thinking of.
You deserve the best. Act like it.